Wisconsin Dells, Part II

Chris and I awoke Saturday morning with the intention of meeting with Ron, a representative of the timeshare people, to fill out a quick survey before heading on our way to the Carr Valley Cheese Factory. We even managed to get up and ready by 9:30am, which let’s face it, for us is pretty early. We weren’t completely sure how to get to his office, so we took the elevator to the right floor and saw an unmarked door. Not knowing what else to do, I pulled one open and we saw a vast office full of cubicles and men in button-up shirts standing by the water cooler. Sort of an odd scene to stumble upon in a resort/hotel.

As soon as we saw this, Chris knew what was up. They were definitely going to try to get us to buy something. The room had “sales” written all over it. We seemed to have found the back entrance, though, because no one came up to us. I shut the door quickly and looked at Chris.

“Not happening,” he said.

He grabbed my hand and we ran downstairs and outside to the car. We jumped in and didn’t look back as we made our way to the Cheese Factory. When we arrived here, however, we found one of the many examples of inaccurate advertising we’ve encountered thus far. Our brochure said we could come and tour the factory as they make cheese until 11:30am. When we arrived at 10:30am, the factory floor was already cleaned up and spotless, not a sign of cheese anywhere. In the store, we were able to sample a couple types of cheese, and even the famous cheese curds, which were made that very morning. Basically, a cheese curd is a very squeaky, almost tasteless piece of cheese. Weird, I know.

We bought some cheese and headed back to the dells, where we went to another cheese store and bought more cheese and some sausage.

After that excitement, we made it to the big destination: the Original Wisconsin Ducks. Apparently, the duck boat/tank things were used in World War II. Our driver was pretty funny. He told predictable jokes, but he gave us a black and white snapshot of himself posing with one of the ducks, which was a riot. The dells were very pretty, but it was kind of cold to be cruising along in the water. We were coasting down the hills and pathways pretty fast, though. Lol

Next, we went on the Lost Canyon Tour, which was a horse-drawn carriage ride through the narrowest parts of some of the dells located just a few miles back from the river. The horses were smelly and endearing at the same time. Lots of horse hair flying back in our faces, but we didn’t notice too much because our guide kept us very entertained. Chris and I were the only ones on the tour, so we got to talk to our guide (also named Chris) a bunch and he had some really crazy stories to tell. We found a wonderful little postcard of him giving a tour in 1982, wearing a fashionable red plaid shirt and sporting a mullet. He was extremely good-natured when we teased him about it.

Next on our list was another water park at the resort. This one was called Wild West Water Park. It was fun, but very similar to the other one. Only this one didn’t have a lazy river, or the awesome Hurricane ride. This one did have a single-person waterslide that sent you flying down into this big room that was basically a ball, and you spun around the walls a couple times before getting sucked down into the middle and being spit out at the end of the waterslide.

After the water park, we showered and put on our usual casual clothes again. We headed out to Field’s Steakhouse, assuming it would be a restaurant where we could get steaks. As we walked in, we past a girl in a short skirt and high heels and laughed at how ridiculous she looked standing out there in the cold. (It was also raining a bit). Once we got into the lobby, however, we realized we were the ones getting laughed at. Over the sounds of a grand piano, and under the soft blue lighting and past the waiters in tuxes, we noticed that everyone was extremely dressed up. We looked at each other and turned toward the door, once again running out hand-in-hand. Lol

We ended up at Moosejaw restaurant, which was decorated in animal heads and furs mounted to the walls. A big chandelier of horns hung in the middle of the cabin-like room. At least our t-shirt and jeans look fit in here. Dinner was good—we finally got our steaks—and we headed back to the room, utterly exhausted from our busy day.

Today was a full day of driving: almost 10 hours on the road. Somewhere in Kentucky, I actually saw the price of gas go up. So as you can guess, we're both pretty exhausted and ready to hit the hay.